‘Jumping’ Jack?

Been attending this church a few weeks now. Falls within the popular, posh, well air-conditioned, properly organised, and predominantly filled with youth/young professionals genre; located right in the heart of the Federal Capital Territory.

Although initially introduced by a cousin who is in absolute awe and very well pleased of her discovery, I finally accept to attend when a friend invites me to their conference in the hope that we’d meet up afterwards to chat over dinner/a few drinks. I must confess the dinner/drinks were more enticing than being seated in a congregation of complete strangers under the anointing of a man I knew not nor had heard not of. Fortunately, the Word was good and repentantly, I revisited to attend subsequent services.

Having done that faithfully for weeks, sis dearest comments to my mother “We are waiting to see the man she will bring from there”. I do not remember any conversation with her or any other outlining that an item on my church attendance agenda. Apparently, a single attending a youth/predominantly singles gathering frequently must be on some coded mission to return ‘hooked’. Like the church has some hidden mission statement to all singles that walk through its doors “Come as you are and you will never return the same”.

It is not unusual to spring into rash conclusions without taking a minute to delve facts. However, this often results in absolutely wrong conclusions and has the potential of ruining once pleasant relationships.

Some of such scenarios off the top of my head (you may add to it):

  • A phone call/visit to someone you have not been in touch with for some time INTERPRETED AS your needing a favour (the recipient usually responds saying “What do you want?”, “You called me! Is something wrong?” etc
  • A random nice gesture from the opposite sex INTERPRETED AS a ‘move’; the initial step into wooing
  • Someone in the latest car/designer outfit/hair extensions/house(s) in choice areas etc INTERPRETED AS rich enough for financial support. Where such requests are declined the person making the requests is quick to hurl miserly, mean and selfish remarks
  • Outbreaks of famine, sickness, poverty, natural disasters etc INTERPRETED AS the nonexistence of God. If He did exist why all the peril? Or maybe He just does not care??

Before jumping into conclusions and declaring your verdict(s), it is only fair to properly assess the situation. You owe it to yourself, at least. Is that rash conclusion worth severing your relationships?

Save yourself the headache, sleepless nights and unnecessary depression; ASK, don’t jump!

*Jump (verb) /juhmp/

A Nigerian slang meaning presumptuous

Quick to assume/conclude

6 thoughts on “‘Jumping’ Jack?

  1. If your posts are anything to go by, you live in the FCT right? so i’m guessing the church is either COZA or HOTR. Bet your sis is just being a typical Naija sis, anxious for her li’l sis to join the marital bliss train ……… Truth be told most single youths go to church to look for husbands. It is good to know there are a few exceptions like you

  2. I agree with you with people making conclusions about going to church to bag a man. to be honest a lot of people do that, even non christians go to church to bag the perfect man or woman not knowing that the person they bag might actually be at the church for the same reason. lol okay I exaggerated a little bit, but I am sure you get my point. Even these days going for single’s conference.. people automatically see it like you are going speed dating! Single’s conferences are very useful, even for people in relationships.. i know i learnt a lot from it. As for jumping into conclusions, i hate it when people do that and I must admit I am guilty sometimes lol I’ll make a note to change.

  3. Agree completely. But I will say this too, a lot of time there is no smoke without fire, but then sometimes it is actually just smoke.
    And yeah, God doesn’t fail, people do!!

  4. It only make sense really (Don’t shoot me yet:-)) I mean if you’re single and go to a church like that, you’ve instantly double if not trippled your chances of ‘hooking’ up with someone. I guess that’s where positioning yourself comes in.

    Imagine a single young lady going to a church with a bunch of ‘elderly people and hardly any young like-minded character…well she can forget that her potential hubby will come from her church.
    Having said all, care must be taken!

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