Ever wondered why he’s left you for someone else, what she has over you or what he sees in her after all you’ve ‘done’ for him? Well, worry no more. The ‘other woman’ voices out; dishing out tips on how she got your man and what she’s doing to keep him as hers and how you can keep her and her likes from your relationship. Enjoy!(Culled from reading about cheating spouses online).
1.Be genuinely interested in your partner. Not the mundane how was your day but updates show you listen and think about his issues.
2. Pay attention to his work. Good men pride themselves on being excellent providers, and this is a big source of what feeds their egos. Even if it’s not something you have knowledge of, learn the details of his work and add value where you can. Many Nigerian men meet their mistresses through work. And he will think she’s intelligent because she knows about his business.
3. No limits. Let’s face it sex is a big part of what they’re looking for outside. Send your man nude pictures, lick his balls, stick a wet finger there, send him a text saying how wet you are. 
Do you have that extra wet ovulation sex with him? So what if you’ve been married forever or if you’re someone’s mother, be sexually adventurous. He’s your man, there should be no limits. We don’t have these limits and boundaries in bed with your man and he enjoys it.
4. Focus on the two of you. She is not your problem, if it’s not her, it would be someone else. Stop fighting him over her, she’s definitely not fighting him over you. In fact if she’s smart she probably praises you and tells him to take it easy with madam when he’s upset with home. This makes her seem pleasant and warm against your antagonistic behaviour. Its hard but chin up and be nice when you discourage him from outside relationship
5. It’s not just physical. Half the time when you finally see a bitch like me who has been servicing your man, she’s not finer than you. But she makes your man feel like a king, a sex god, a mentor, wanted, needed, and appreciated. She sends him lunch to his office, she gives him pedicures herself with lemon slices and rose petals in the water. She asks his opinion on major things. Replace her, make him feel good
6. She is totally dependent and independent too. Mistresses are rarely lay-about women. She probably has a good demanding career and he admires that about her but at the same time she balances that and demands he takes care of her. He does it because he feels that she could do it for herself anyways.
7. Loosen up. You’ve got to act like a fun girlfriend not an uptight one. Follow him to parties, swim topless with him in your pool.
8. Know that even the mistress is thinking of how to keep away intruders too. So she’s never secure. You are.
9. Be spontaneous. Let me tell you it’s so easy to carry on a torrid affair with a man who knows his wife and her schedule because he tends to be able to make and keep dates with us. However when a man constantly cancels dates sooner than later, we side chics get tired of it. So be spontaneous, show up randomly at his office with lunch and maybe a quickie. He’ll be excited but do it enough times and his office becomes off limits to her. If he travels for work, get on a flight the next day to meet him. That stops all that travel pillow waka with the girlfriend. One day, pick him up from the office and take him to dinner at a nice restaurant, he won’t have time to do his after work quickie with us… so use spontaneity to block his chances of seeing us often. It’s less aggressive than confronting him over the babe.
10. Keep up your appearance. Change your hair every two weeks, work out to keep your body tight, dress well every time you step out, and smile like you get it good every night. This is for you, him and others. Trust me, people around will notice how fine and maintained you are and tell him. This will make him wonder what’s up with you and pay attention to you. You sef will feel as good as you look. Win win.
11. Terms of endearment. When I communicate with your husband the only time I call him by his first name is NEVER. It’s always, my baby, sweetheart, my darling, honey, chief, handsome, chairman, sexy etc. Even if I’m having an argument with him o. He eats this up, and it will take nothing from you.
12. Talk to your man. Believe it or not, this is what your husband and I do most of the time we’re together. It’s not just a sex thing. I listen to him, I gist with him, I spar with him verbally. Don’t get me wrong, it’s necessary to talk about mundane things like school fees and getting a new house help, but your man wants to know the latest gossip you heard from the salon, he wants to discuss the Boston bombers with you, he wants to just talk and be listened to. Try for him.
13. Do not abandon him for the kids. Many wives do this and your husbands are resentful of this. They pour all their love and attention to the children and treat the man as an accessory. The man then meets someone else who seems to give him all he’s missing at home and na do trouble dey start. It is hard to not focus on your children since they seem to need it more. They don’t. You knew your husband first, make him a priority. Get help to help you manage this or he might get help outside to help you manage it.
14. Let your man spoil you. Ask him for things, trips, and gifts. All of the married men I’ve dated or been wooed by get trips from being a sugar daddy. Even if you can afford to buy yourself everything, ask him to please do it and when he does be overly effusive with gratitude. A blow job is a perfect thank you for Prada. A good man wants to be a provider. Not just of the necessary things like diesel and upkeep money, but of luxuries like $3000 purses and custom blended perfume. See you think you’re being a great wife by being prudent and helping him conserve his resources and you are, but if you don’t chop his money too, someone else will.
15. Stop going away with the kids for summer. Ha. Every summer, Lagos empties and mistresses solidify their position. So by the end of May when you’ve bundled your troops to America or Europe, we are spending every evening with and go clubbing with him on Fridays, spending the day at the beach on Saturday and cooking him lunch after church on Sunday. All 12 weeks of summer. It’s no wonder we get a new car or other extravagant gifts in September’s. A thank you for companionship present. Stop abandoning him for that long. If you manage to force him to go with you, leave when he’s leaving. A 3 month holiday is excessive.
Please don’t take this advice as me blaming women for their cheating spouses. Women are not to blame for that at all, that’s the man’s weakness. But the less room you leave, the less likely the weakness can be exploited by another woman.
notmadblackwoman's blog 